In 2019 I was quite sick with endometriosis and spent much of the year in a lot of pain, in the hospital, and having surgery. I still had the best income year in 13 years of business. Once I was well again I thought, "that’s it! I will take on 2020! If I did as well as I did while I was sick, imagine how much I can make if I really put all my energy into it!"
I slipped into hustle mode. I was looking for flow, and I tried to force it. But when I force things, they don’t work. In fact, when I try to hustle, I break things!
I got on a call with a coach (because no matter how much you know, it is really hard to recognize your own stuff!!) to try to figure out why I was spinning out so much and it quickly became clear that it was time to surrender.
Surrender the need to know the how of everything.
Surrender the control.
Surrender the tendency to slip back in to hustle.
Surrender to flow.
So, I picked surrender as my 2021 word and tried to just let things happen a little bit more.
What happened - my income increased again (not quite to 2019 levels, but close) and even more importantly, I worked less. I spent more time with my family. I stressed less about what I should be doing. I did more of the kind of work that I loved. I ENJOYED the work I was doing more. It was a gift.
I like to pick a word for my year every year - I find that it helps remind me of what is really important to me. It helps guide my decisions and my direction. But honestly, by the end of the year I often barely remember what word I picked, and as I dig back to figure it out, I realize that it often just happened once I set the intention.
Last week I ran my Biz Accelerator members through a workshop on setting intentions for 2022 and I settled on my word for this coming year: Impact.
When I spent time thinking about what is important, how I want my business to grow, what feels meaningful and what I feel ready for - impact was clear. I want to share messages that help business owners see their potential and believe in themselves. I want to share messages that help people see how we’ve been set up to think we’re failing when we’re not. I want to help women who run businesses enjoy the success of their businesses. The beauty of the word impact is that I can do that through my work and beyond - and that it pushes me out of a whole lot of comfort zones when it comes to imposter syndrome and visibility.
If you’ve already picked YOUR word, I’d love to hear it. Hit reply and let me know.
If you haven’t and are looking for some tips on how to pick, here are some thoughts.
1 - I have a year in review workbook that will give you a lot of insight into what you want to focus on going into 2022. That exercise can really help.
2 - Spend some time on the following questions:
What have you found to be a regular roadblock in the last year? Are there things that get in the way from external sources, things you are frustrated that you don’t get done, things that you avoid, things that you wish were different? Look for themes of frustration.
Are there big themes in your business goals and the actions you want to take this year? Do you want to see yourself doing more of a certain kind of work? Now let's look for takeaways. Does anything need to change/ is there a clear desire that came up to focus on?
3. Make a list of words that you like - you can Google “word of the year” and there are all kinds of posts with 100s of suggestions. Try to come up with at least 10 that you like, then narrow it down to three, and then see if one can really encompass them all.
Setting intentions and gaining clarity on what you're building and growing can help take so much of the stress and overwhelm out of your business. I hope this exercise helped and that you've found a word that brings you joy. I can’t wait to hear all your words and I look forward to connecting with and supporting you in 2022!
5 things that were key to hitting my sales goals in 2021
I’ve been reflecting on the key things that helped me reach my business goals and what helped me the most this year and I think it comes down to 5 things (that you can build into your business too!).
1) Networking
I have never been particularly comfortable with networking. I’m introverted/shy and kind of awkward when it comes to putting myself out there so I often stay in my comfortable communities talking to the same people over and over again.
However, when I commit to networking more, it almost always directly translates into opportunities and new clients.
This year I committed to saying yes to networking opportunities that I saw come up and engaging within the group programs that I was a part of. Not only did that translate into growing my network, but I also ended up on several podcasts, and had people sign up for some of my offerings.
Are you taking advantage of opportunities to grow your network?
2) Accountability
Without accountability, I tend to put things off – especially if they’re new and have no real deadline. Based on my 6 years working as a business coach, I know that to be true for most business owners so if you find yourself doing the same, you aren’t alone.
Real accountability is key for me. Putting things in the calendar (and letting other people know about them), asking my assistant to remind me of things, signing up for coaching and programs that push me to get things done, even if it's only because I invested in something and I want to make sure it’s worth it.
I also host at least 2 accountability sessions a month (sometimes up to 4) as part of my Biz Accelerator program and these not only help members get their stuff done, I get MY stuff done at the same time. Actively committing to doing something within a certain time frame with an audience to witness whether or not I follow-through is kind of magical.
3) Coaching
I believe coaches need coaches, and other than a short time during the pandemic, I have consistently been in a program with a coach for the last 7 years. Working with a coach means that I have someone in my corner to call me out on my bullshit, to help me work through the muddle that shows up in my brain, and again, helps me stay accountable to taking action on my goals.
I truly believe there are some things that we simply can’t solve within our own heads no matter how much we know, and having people that we feel safe and comfortable with, sharing our vulnerabilities to, and asking for help from can make all the difference in the world. I love that I get to be that person for others, but also that I know I can’t be that person for myself.
4) Confidence
Confidence in yourself is probably the most important of all of the things that you need as a business owner to find success.
Confidence that you’re creating value.
Confidence that people want a solution to the problem you solve.
Confidence that you have the ability to run a business.
Confidence that you have the ability to make sales.
Confidence that people want to buy what you have to sell.
Regularly spending time reflecting on my worth and reminding myself that I DO have confidence in all of those things means that I can ask for sales without sounding nervous or like I feel bad about the price of what I’m selling. I have the confidence to tell people what I believe they will get out of working with me. I have the confidence to allow myself to create a successful business without it having to hurt.
And the more confidence I have in myself, the more that confidence is contagious.
What practices do you put into place to reinforce your belief in yourself?
5) A clear idea of what I was selling
No matter how confident you are, if you aren’t clear on how you’re going to reach your financial goals when taking into account your capacity and time and the price of what you sell, you can end up in a situation where the numbers simply don’t add up.
Ask yourself what goals you’re looking to reach and what you will sell to get there. If the numbers don’t line up, it might be time to make some changes in your offerings, your pricing, or your target audience.
Can you build all of these into your business for 2022?
Keeping these in mind, spend time thinking about what actions you can take moving into 2022.
Is shame dragging you down?
This morning I’m being interviewed for a podcast on shame and it’s got me thinking about a topic I talk about regularly - how shame impacts your business.
I talk to a lot of business owners who share their daily struggles with me and something that I hear ALL THE TIME is how bad it is for them to be doing a thing, thinking a thing, considering a thing.
I know I shouldn’t be worrying about my prices, but I’m all in a swirl about telling someone the cost of my program.
I know that I should be staying on top of my bookkeeping but I’m months behind again.
I know I should make a monthly/weekly/plan but I suck and I just wing it every single day.
I know it would be a good idea for me to figure out all the details of this project but I just keep avoiding it and I’m so angry at myself.
All of these statements are about the person saying them being WRONG/BAD.
If I could just stop being terrible then things would be better. And that’s shame.
Shame is a heavy mental load to carry and can be exhausting. So now, on top of feeling frustrated, discouraged, anxious, or grouchy about the thing that’s difficult, we feel this extra internal load that can be paralysing.
I know that letting go of shame is not as simple as realizing what it’s doing to you, but I want to offer you a few thoughts and tips to consider.
Everyone experiences a lot of this stuff.
You are not alone in feeling any of the things you feel. So, next time you think “everyone else can do this just fine, why can’t I?!” I hope that my voice will creep into your mind and remind you that that simply isn’t true. All of the feelings are being experienced by others all of the time - it’s a human experience and you are no worse than anyone else for feeling it.
Acceptance can help.
If you KNOW that you’re going to feel anxious, frustrated, overwhelmed, etc. and accept it as part of the process, it can be easier to feel less shame as you’re travelling through it. I know that I’m going to be a bear to deal with whenever I’m doing something that’s pushing me out of my comfort zone. I’ve learned to warn people to accept it and recognize it when it’s happening. “Oh! I’m at the part where I’m really anxious and uncomfortable and MAD at past Lara for thinking this was a good idea. It’s best to not ask me how I’m doing or tell me I’m going to do great because I’m not in a great headspace. I’ll be fine on the other side.”
If you know you’re going to get stressed or overwhelmed when doing certain things in your business, what can you do to prepare yourself and accept that it’s going to happen and feel less guilty and shameful about it?
Ask for help/ Look for hacks.
You may have a hard time believing this but you don’t need to be perfect at everything. You are amazing at so many things and there are going to be things that aren’t your zone of genius. That’s ok! This is where you can look for shortcuts, hacks, or ask for help, and it doesn’t mean you need to feel bad about yourself for not doing that thing the way you thought it SHOULD be done.
I run accountability sessions as part of the Biz Accelerator program because not only do I know my clients get more done when we do things together - so do I. Did I used to feel silly for being able to do more just because other people were with me on Zoom doing it? For sure. Have I realized that it’s actually very clever of me to have figured out something that works instead of feeling badly about not doing it well alone? Also yes.
When you figure out the ways to work around the overwhelm, the distraction, the avoidance and the guilt, you’re doing a GOOD thing, not being lesser for doing it differently.
Shame is exhausting.
Letting go of shame is liberating.
It’s a journey but one step at a time you can let go of the shame, embrace yourself and the ways you do things, and find ways to support yourself when needed.
If you can beat yourself up just a little bit less this week after reading this, that will be an incredible win and one that I wish for you.
Why it feels like there's never enough time
One thing I often hear from business owners is that there is never enough time to do everything they want to get done (AND they aren't making enough money!). So, I want to share a few tips to help with that (some of these might apply more to service-based businesses).
1) STop being a time optimist.
ADHD brains are particularly bad at this. As you may know, I have ADHD. I think everything is going to take me less time than it does - especially getting places.
If this sounds familiar, my advice to you is to stop trying to do so many things in a day. Give yourself three tasks to do in a day instead of asking yourself to do 25 and then being mad at yourself when you don't get them all done. Things take longer than you think!
2) Stop underquoting and over-delivering.
This goes along with being a time optimist. You tell someone something is going to cost a certain amount of money based on how long you think it will take but discover it’s going to take twice as long but don't charge twice as much. On top of that, you also think of a few other things you can do that would make the project/service even better and want to WOW the client. So, now you've spent three times the amount of time on a project and are still getting paid the original fee.
Ways to overcome this are to double your time estimate from the start so that you're being more realistic about the time it will take and charging more fairly. You can also offer different packages with higher and lower amounts of time/deliverables so that people can choose to take the option with fewer of the bells and whistles and pay accordingly if they want them.
3) Stop beating yourself up for not always being productive.
We all need downtime. Let yourself have some instead of taking some and feeling guilty about it. Let yourself be okay with not producing more more more all the time. The energy we waste on shame means we have less energy to give when we're feeling excited and into things. Some of the time we're losing is more about energy and not actual minutes.
Did you find these tips helpful? Would you add anything? Leave a comment and let me know.
Simple truths about leading a virtual team
With circumstances having forced many to unexpectedly work remotely, leaders have had to think quickly and adapt how they manage their teams. Remote work isn’t going away any time soon (and many are hoping it never will). Those who are working and leading a team remotely successfully have embraced these simple truths about leading a virtual team.
1) It’s not the same as leading a team in person
Leading a team virtually is not the same as doing so in-person. You can’t just pop-in to each other’s offices to check in on things. You may not have those daily checkpoints about what you did on the weekend, the weather, or that great deal you got on <insert thing you love here>.
The way things work in an office and in a virtual setting is different, but both can work really well if you know what will make it efficient and feel good. If you try to do the same thing you did in-person online, it may feel clunky and disjointed and like things aren’t working.
The key to figuring out what to do next is knowing that it may be very different than what you’ve done in the past, and that’s OK!
2) Creating connection helps
One of the amazing things about working in an office is the connection between employees - both when it comes to working on projects and problems together, but also just the “chit chat” in the halls. In fact, one of the things that we hear the most about why people wouldn’t want to work from home all the time/permanently is that it would be too lonely or that they don’t feel that they connect as well and understand what’s going on as well online.
That means that opportunities for two-way conversations, collaboration, and “chit chat” should be worked into the fabric of the remote work culture. As a leader, you can encourage this and create opportunities for it throughout the workday. How you do this may vary depending on your team (some will love daily “stand up” check-in meetings, playing online board games, ice breakers and “my favourite trashy TV show” forums, and others would prefer brainstorming sessions and forums for sharing useful work-related tips - find what will work best for your team and start there).
3) Finding tools and systems that work for your team in a virtual environment is imperative
There are tools and systems for almost anything you can think of. Finding those tools and figuring out the best ways for your team to use them effectively can make all the difference between feeling frustrated with how things are running on your team (I have no idea what everyone is working on, I think they all feel like I’m micromanaging them, I don’t think they know what they’re supposed to do, they’re brand new and don’t have access to the whole team any time they have a question, etc).
4) It takes practice and patience
There may be bumps as you change the way your teams work to adapt to online. Things you thought might work might not, things that will work might take time to start working, things you’ve been avoiding trying might be the best option.
And you’re going to need to create new habits and ways of being that may be uncomfortable at first. All the folks on your team that would prefer to keep the camera off at all times may need to have the camera on at least a percentage of the time because it’s important for reading body language. Meetings that used to be optional may need to be required for a while so that everyone gets in the habit of taking advantage of certain tools and of connecting and communicating online. You may need to have more meetings than you think are REALLY necessary because creating connection needs to be forced for a while.
Some of making this work may require doing things that you know are good for you even if you don’t feel like doing them. Once you know that then you’ll be in a better position to create things that really work for everyone.
Want to learn more on creating connectivity and alignment with your team? Sign up for the Leading a Remote Team online program. Hosted by myself and Jocelyne Morin-Nurse, CEO of Loxentus Inc., this online instructional course uncovers the most efficient leadership styles for remote teams, including:
Creating a team that feels cohesive and understands the core values of the business.
Getting clarity on action steps, tools and systems.
Gaining more time by learning how to best combine asynchronous and synchronous communication.
This is an implementation course that includes a downloadable worksheet, downloadable audio, downloadable transcripts, and bonus tips with downloadable audio.
For more information and to sign up, visit https://www.loxentus.com/leadingremotecourseinfo.